“Cristy, we would like to invite you to come back and sit with us,” said a member of the spiritual leadership team.

This was summer of 2023, when I attended a Christian-themed business conference.

I was sitting in the very front row, because I liked it. I could see, I could hear, and I didn’t have to look over people’s heads.

The problem with this lady’s request to go back and sit with her and her leadership group is that they were in the VERY back, where I’d never be able to hear (because I don’t hear out of one ear and wasn’t wearing my hearing aid).

So while I was flattered to be invited, I thought about it for a sec, and then said, “No thank you.”

“Uh, w-w-what?” she stammered. “We want you…just grab your stuff and come back and sit with us.”

“I like my spot here,” I replied.

“You don’t want to come back and sit with us?” she repeated. 

Clearly, she hadn’t expected me to say no, and wasn’t sure how to handle it!

A lot of people would have said YES because this lady was part of the “spiritual leader” group. I’m sure they’re an amazing group!

And like I said, I was flattered to be asked.

But I did NOT want to sit in the back of the room and miss out on the info I’d come all that way to get.

I explained my hearing loss situation to her, and she finally accepted that I wasn’t moving from my spot.

As you read through this, what do you think you’d have done in that same situation?

Would you have been so flattered to be asked that you’d have gathered up all your stuff and sat all the way in the back just to “be nice” or “show respect” or whatever?

Or would you have stayed in the seat you wanted to be in, where you could hear the speaker and get the information you came to get?

It’s hard to know EXACTLY what we’d do in any situation until we’re actually in it.

But you get the point.

Doing what’s right for you sometimes means doing what other people won’t like or expect.

It doesn’t mean you can’t respond to them with respect and gratitude.

But you don’t have to conform to what someone else wants for you when it’s in direct conflict with what you KNOW is right for you.

If your friends want you to hit the bars and binge drink, you are allowed to say no.

If your partner wants to go out for a huge 9 PM dinner and split a chocolate lava cake with you, you are allowed to say no.

If your mom thinks you should eat the pie she made you and puts you on a guilt trip when you don’t want to because you know it’ll set you back a week, guess what? You are still allowed to say NO!

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: do what’s right for you…not in a way that tramples other people, but in a way that takes your best interest into account, too.