When I tell you to start putting yourself first in your life, what’s the first thought that pops into your head?
Probably something like…
“But I don’t want to turn into a total jerk.”
“But people will think I’m arrogant.”
“So I’m just supposed to leave my husband and kids to fend for themselves, and never help anyone ever again?”
All those thoughts are symptoms of the overcorrection phenomenon.
It’s a tendency most human beings have to leap from one extreme to the other, instead of finding the truth in the middle.
Hey, I get it. I’ve caught myself doing the same thing.
And going from one extreme to the other can serve a purpose. It’s not that it’s “wrong” in every situation, for every person.
But overcorrecting in the way most people do it – automatically assuming that making any kind of change means soaring to the complete opposite end of the spectrum – does create a lot of totally unnecessary drama.
Case in point: When I say put yourself first, it doesn’t mean you need to overcorrect into a selfish, rude person who leaves everyone else on the planet to “fend for themselves.”
“Well MY needs come first, so everyone else can get out of my way or get out of my life.”
Not only is that gonna blow up in your face, it’s not being true to yourself. You’re a compassionate person who enjoys helping other people.
When I tell you to put yourself first, it does NOT mean you ignore everyone else from now until the end of time.
It means you include YOUR needs in the lineup of people you help and care about, and make them a priority, instead of putting your needs dead last.
When your needs become a priority for YOU, guess what happens?
You feel better. You’re naturally happier and more equipped to be there for the people you love.
Putting yourself dead last, on the other hand, is like driving a car with nothing but fumes in the tank. It’s only a matter of time before it breaks down.
Fill your tank, and keep it full – so you can be a force for good in your own life, instead of a wiped out afterthought – by making YOUR needs a priority.
Fill your cup so you can help other people fill theirs!
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