What Is This Episode About…
People apologize for the wrong reasons! They apologize for how they’re parenting, how messy their house is, and they apologize for their weight loss. They’re acting SORRY that they’re on a health journey, and it doesn’t fit into the social norm. So they feel like they’re putting others out, which is NOT TRUE!
Chronic apologizing, even for things that you shouldn’t be apologizing about, indicate a lack of confidence or insecurity. It is a bad habit that we all should eliminate from our lives. As we talked about in an earlier episode, you should be okay with being in uncomfortable situations without the need to apologize.
The problem with being a chronic apologizer is that your credibility goes down. People never believe you, even when you are genuinely sorry. They are used to you apologizing for stuff that doesn’t even matter. This need to apologize comes from the need to justify everything we do.
Certainly, you shouldn’t be apologizing for your weight loss journey. You won’t believe it, but we see so many people apologizing for their weight loss. They apologize for making healthier choices and putting themselves first. Be confident in yourself, and do YOU!
Click play on this episode to learn more about how to be more confident in life and go about your business without the need to constantly apologize.
Key Takeaways
- Why chronic apologizing indicates a lack of confidence (07:37)
- Being okay with uncomfortable situations without apologizing (08:29)
- How to say NO in a firm but respectful way (11:27)
- When you are a chronic apologizer, your credibility goes down (12:08)
- Don’t feel the need to justify anything (13:12)
- Never apologize for your weight loss journey and making better choices (16:31)
- Be confident in yourself, and don’t devalue yourself by constantly apologizing (25:51)
- Don’t feel the need to fill the silence with an apology (27:47)
Learn More About The Content Discussed…
Get the Code Red On-The-Go Guide here.
Join the next 10-Pound Takedown Challenge here.
When Was It Released…
This episode was released November 11, 2020
Episode Transcript…
The Transcript Is Auto-Generated And May Contain Spelling And Grammar Errors
Cari 0:00
Be who you are, be confident what you saying your decisions and let it speak for itself. It’s okay. If you don’t have a wine seltzer at the party. It’s fine. You be you. It’s okay. If you don’t let your children if you’re overprotective, and they’re allowed to jump on trampolines, it’s fine.
Cristy 0:17
Just be you. Absolutely. And start really believing that your weight loss journey and your health journey, it matters just like spirituality. So God is number one. Number two, is you.
Unknown Speaker 0:33
I’m Cristy Code Red and you’re listening to rebel weight loss and lifestyle, where we believe food holds the power to heal or poison. And we believe our society has been misled regarding proper nutrition and weight loss. You’re in the right place if you’re looking for some straight up truth, because I’m here to shed light on the lies and brainwashing that has taken place over the past five decades. Thanks so much for listening.
Cristy 1:02
Welcome back to weight loss and lifestyle. I’m your host, Cristy code, red author, entrepreneur, retired professional boxer. And it’s always a good day when Cari Thompson can join me. Hi, everybody. Thank you for letting me be here. Cristy. It is so much more fun. And it’s easier when you hear is half the work is half the brain power is half everything for me. I can just transfer that to you.
Cari 1:27
But twice the fun
Cristy 1:28
choice the fun, right? I get to laughing so hard on our podcasts when I and I do I mean, it’s just there’s so much fun to listen to.
Cari 1:37
I listen to them every Wednesday and I talk to them as if I am right there. I’m like, Yeah, totally. And then I’m like, you see, I’m basically talking back to myself about a conversation that I already had.
Cristy 1:54
Yeah, but I do the same thing. I don’t know. I don’t know for weird but you know, what it does for me to re listen to are the challenge videos or the podcasting or whatever. It strengthens my commitment to the Code Red lifestyle and just the proper human diet in general. It strengthens my because we we believe the foundational core beliefs, and every time I hear what we believe it just completely solidifies it even further. I agree. I agree. 100%. Today, you guys were talking about stop apologizing. I’m sorry.
Cari 2:29
Cristy I’m sorry for saying sorry about being sorry.
Cristy 2:33
You guys. I actually had to talk to Cari about this in her last evaluation. I think
Cari 2:37
I was gonna mention that. I was gonna say once there was a day when Christie gave me an employee evaluation and on it was the first one was quit touching your bangs.
Unknown Speaker 2:51
And the next thing was stop apologizing.
Cristy 2:54
Yeah, if she reaches down from the top like this and flip, flip, flip, flip. She see some, there’s no they stop apologizing. And at first I was gonna I was gonna say this. I was going to call this podcast, stop apologizing about your weight loss journey. And Cari said people need to stop apologizing in general. So I said, let’s just call this stop apologizing. So here’s how this came about. I keep my finger on the pulse of Code Red by going through all the coaching groups on Facebook. I read the comments. I also stay connected on Instagram. Also stay connected on YouTube, really trying to keep my finger on the pulse of what the clients and the customers are thinking and feeling and saying and what they’re going through. But I mean, we’ve gone through this for years, I just but for some reason it really just to the front of my mind. People are constantly apologizing for like their whole weight loss journey. So this this the one thing that brought this up that made me go crap, I’m gonna call curious if she can podcast with me on this subject. If she said, like, like, john and Sally invited my husband and I over for dinner tomorrow night. But it’s not until 8pm and she’s having casseroles and rolls and biscuits and gravy. And I don’t know, whatever. It was all just complete total. Totally not Code Red it was garbage is what it was. Then she said, Oh, so nervous. So nervous. Don’t know what to do. I mean, it’s later than my cutoff time and I just end it What if she did? And there were like, 27 comments of people that were helping her with what she could say to the host. And it was like you can say this, like, Oh, I have a gluten allergy. Oh, it was like it was a lot of lies. Like how can we lie to the host so that it doesn’t hurt her feelings. But the lady was absolutely in. She was torn up about this situation.
Cari 4:46
And probably called that hostess and was like, I’m so sorry. I just, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. And when we apologize, everyone listening. You take your own power away. Krissy Don’t you think? And you pull yourself down to a different level. Now, if you do something wrong, I think it’s perfectly legitimate. Like if I were late to disappoint with Christie, I would say, hey, Sorry, I’m late. I was yelling at dogs. I’m here. That’s legitimate, but I felt like sorry. Oh my gosh, I’m sorry. I’m wearing my grand style t shirt. I’m sorry. I didn’t curl my hair all the way. It’s just, it takes your own power away. Do you notice that?
Cristy 5:27
Yeah, I think it’s pathetic. I can’t stand it. I I think there’s difference between there’s a difference between a legitimate apology like I just want to apologize for being late to our meeting. I just want to apologize for what I said today without thinking it hurt your feelings. Man, that was totally wrong of me. I am so sorry. That I get it but somebody who just constantly Oh, I’m sorry, sorry, sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry, sorry. You know, and then they throw that out there. Like, number one, it doesn’t hold the power. When they’re constantly saying it. That’s annoying. It’s pathetic. And it does it takes the power. Why are you demeaning yourself constantly for no reason, especially when it comes to your weight loss?
Cari 6:08
Yes. And I even noticed Cristy, have you noticed this, that people almost apologized to other people because they have lost weight? Almost like Well, I’m really sorry. Like, like, Wow, you really lost weight? Well, you know, I know, I’m sorry. And tell you about it. Or, um, and I’ve noticed this, it’s just such an interesting paradigm now from a former chronic apologizer. I don’t know why I did it. You know, I think it was kind of to fill the void. It was kind of to take up the space where it would otherwise be uncomfortable. I think that’s sometimes the reason. For instance, hey, Cari, can you bake five dozen cookies on Tuesday for an Marie’s class? No. And and just say, No, no, I am going to be doing this or that doesn’t fit into my schedule,
Unknown Speaker 6:59
or
Cari 6:59
no, with no, you don’t need to explain yourself. Now. A lot of times, I’ll be like, No, I’m so sorry. I’m telling you. Okay, so Brandon’s having surgery. I just got some new chickens. I have four turkeys in the garage. You know, my niece is here, and she has her three dogs, and then we have the puppies. No, just stop. You don’t need to explain. You don’t need to apologize. You just need to say what you’re gonna say. And let it sit? Is it gonna be uncomfortable sometimes? Yeah, it is. It’s uncomfortable being late for a meeting and just saying sorry. And then not filling up the space with a bunch of other crap. Do you know what I mean?
Cristy 7:37
Right. Yeah. And I think personally, when somebody who has chronic apologize for like that, where it doesn’t even need to be, but they do it anyway. I think it’s a lack of confidence.
Unknown Speaker 7:48
Yeah, I do too.
Cristy 7:49
I bet it’s an insecurity. And I also think that they feel a little bit weird talking to when you’ve lost the weight when you’ve lost no 86 pounds, then you’re talking to someone who’s still struggling with their weight. It makes you feel like you You feel kind of bad. Like you don’t want to make them feel bad. You don’t feel bad about your weight, but you feel embarrassed for them or you don’t want it you don’t want to embarrass them while you’ve lost a lot of weight. Yes, you look good. Thank you. Instead of what did we do? We shy away from it? Oh, oh, well, you know, I mean, and then you just start building the instead of just stopping and saying thank you. You feel like it somehow you don’t want to hurt that person’s feelings for still being overweight?
Cari 8:29
Yeah, I think you’re absolutely right. So I think that apologizing the habit of being a chronic offender where apologizing is concerned, has a lot to do with your confidence. It has a lot to do with your inability to be okay with uncomfortable situations. And we did a podcast on this, didn’t we?
Unknown Speaker 8:49
Yeah,
Cari 8:50
we did do a podcast on that. If not, here it goes. Hi, welcome to rebel weight loss. There are going to be situations they’re going to be uncomfortable. Recently, my husband had to tell a family member of ours something very uncomfortable, and he just had to do it. And he did it. And he’s okay with things being uncomfortable. And Cristy is very okay with things being uncomfortable. And you have to just sit with it. You just have to it’s kind of sometimes the reason that we self medicate with food. Because we don’t want to sit with our feelings. We don’t want to be okay with our feelings. We don’t want to be okay with not apologizing so we eat. It helps with the anxiety. But sometimes it’s okay just to not say you’re sorry. If you aren’t sorry, then don’t say it. The problem is it’s like crying wolf Cristy, then nobody believes you when you have a sincere apology to give absolutely nobody believes you.
Cristy 9:48
So my last name is Nickel, because I’m married Jason nickel back in 2010. Jason nickel ex husband, one of my ex husbands. But the only one that was really a
Unknown Speaker 9:58
cool dude. We’re not getting out. lists
Unknown Speaker 10:02
cuz I
Unknown Speaker 10:03
believe me
Unknown Speaker 10:04
I got I got a notebook full here no
Cristy 10:08
I think I um by the way I got a sidebar and tell you that our cousin Kyle Lawton, he was just posted on Instagram that a Breanna and he just celebrated their eighth wedding anniversary. I said so I Instagram to my I did a DM to him. I said, I said eight years already, brother. I said, I can’t believe it’s been so long and I go, I think I was on my second marriage by then.
Unknown Speaker 10:32
I knew you’re gonna say something like that. Eight years. Wow. Don’t like
Cari 10:38
so weird. Well, it feels like and Barbara was just spanking him with the yardstick.
Unknown Speaker 10:44
That’s an inside joke. But it’s true. Like I remember man, that kid was rotten. He was rotten lot naked. And he was in him. Barbara used to get that yardstick off the
Cristy 10:56
top of the frigerator. And she chases down any of our cousins on our dad’s side of the family are listening. Please, please message us and say and back us up on this. Please. Leave. Listen. Yeah, Marcy might listen. I don’t know. They go get Jason nickel. His mom was Barbie nickel. And Barbie nickel used to say to me, of course, this was 20 years ago. I had no I, I didn’t truly appreciate Barbie nickel. You know, we had we butted heads. But she had a lot of great wisdom for me. And she would try to teach me she would say, just say to people, I’m sorry, that simply won’t do. And I don’t like that. I don’t say that now, but she was right. I’m sorry. Not even to the I’m sorry, part that simply won’t do. And she was so good about saying no. And of course you can do it in words. Not a rude way to do it. You know, and sometimes you’re just kind of like, well, geez, you make it more awkward. Jeez, like, you know, you don’t want to make it more awkward. But boy, people are so uncomfortable with that uncomfortableness of saying no. They feel like they they explain themselves
Cari 12:00
and apologize. Explain apologize. Well, I can’t and I’m so sorry. I’ve got this kid said.
Unknown Speaker 12:07
Just stop.
Cari 12:08
Just say you can’t if you need to apologize, apologize. But there’s no need to continue to justify yourself. Because what happens is, when you are a chronic apologizer, your credibility goes down, while the apologies go up. So you have credibility, you have apologies. And as your credibility starts out pretty good. And you start apologizing more your credibility starts going down. Like, is she trying to hide something? Is he trying to hide something? Oh, just dig yourself into a bigger hole? Yes, yes. Yeah. That’d be like if I got home from shopping. And I was like, okay, okay. I’m really sorry. But I mean, that’s setting myself up for a whole argument with my husband, like, don’t just don’t be like, I bought this and he doesn’t care. But I used to feel the need to have to justify all my purchases and apologize for my purchases to a former harsh Breton. So you know, it gets really old and there’s no reason to do that be who you are, be sincere and don’t feel the need to try to have to feel that uncomfortable void. I think
Cristy 13:12
you just hit the nail on the head justify. I think that’s the bigger underlining issue here. We feel the need to justify whatever our weight loss, our kids behavior, our choice of not letting our kids stay at that neighbor’s house. Wow, choice of jobs, our choice of partners, or what did you say? Wow, no, wow, that’s what you were saying? Like, no. Wow. Like, like, preach? Yeah, preach Christie. I think that that’s what it is, is we feel the need to justify our decision. And that usually comes with this horrible apology because we’re so we don’t know what else to say we’re desperate. We’re trying to get them to understand, you know, they’re looking at us a certain way which is digging, and by them looking and responding that can make it worse or better. Or it’s a mess, but justifying. We feel like we have to justify our decisions people and you don’t know nobody, nothing. No. And you
Cari 14:04
know what I hate on Facebook Cristy? Well, I hate so many things.
Cristy 14:07
Oh, me too.
Cari 14:08
But one of the things I hate on Facebook is this post. I’m sorry, by threads. I’m sorry, but whoever’s voting for Trump is an idiot. Or I’m sorry, but if you don’t believe abortion should be legal. You’re stupid. I’m sorry, but nobody should wear skinny jeans. Why are you saying You’re sorry? Again, it automatically no matter what the topic is, when I see it, I’m sorry. But it automatically for me takes away the credibility of the person watching it or I’m writing it. I’m just like, just say it. Both for Trump. Just say it. I don’t believe in abortion. Just say it. I’m anti Vax. I’m pro vaccine, whatever it is. Just say You’ll never catch me. I went and got my flu shot today Cristy and I instagrammed about it and I wasn’t going to go. I’m really sorry. I know not everyone agrees. But I got my flu shot today. No, I got my flu shot. And that’s how I feel. I try not to be too controversial on social media just because of what we do. Because I care about people losing weight, not how people feel about my opinions, but there’s no reason to apologize.
Cristy 15:22
I think that there’s kind of a little bit of a form of apologizing, and it’s saying, honestly, if I’m being honest, if you say those kinds of things, if I’m being honest, well, honestly, well, honestly, I’m, you know, I’m thinking I can’t stand when people use really honestly, or to be honest or anything because I’m thinking, I assumed you were being honest. So why are you justified? You know, if I’m being honest, wait a minute, you weren’t being honest. Before me a mile boxing coach Tom told me never say that during a TV interview. I always say the reality is bla bla bla bla bla. So I, when people say that, to be honest, I immediately I’m always shocked by that. I can’t stand it up because it’s, it’s not necessary. It’s not necessary to preface what you’re saying, because we all think you’re being honest. It is just an understood thing, that you’re being honest. So for you to have to preface something by saying, if I’m being honest, wait a minute, I thought you were being honest.
Cari 16:14
Wait a minute, that’s the thing you think Cristy I don’t think that people are always being honest.
Cristy 16:18
I assume they are. You will,
Cari 16:21
you’re a better person than me. And Cristy, I just want to say I’m really sorry. I’m really sorry. I’m so sorry. I feel bad. I’m sorry.
Cristy 16:31
I think that really my are big. Obviously, we’re in weight loss, we do Code Red, and we run code red. And my biggest thing is why on earth are people apologizing for their weight loss, like they did not apologize for consuming two medium pizzas and an entire box of cinnamon twist, washing it down with a Diet Coke or two liter Diet Coke. They did not apologize for that before, they did not apologize by by going to the Golden Corral buffet. And being in there two and a half hours. They didn’t apologize for any of that. But now that they’ve taken their life back, their agency is down under five. Their waist is down under 3233. For a woman under 44. Men, their blood pressures down, they’re off their c Pap, they’re off their medications, all these things in their life. They’re into a normal size gene. All these things their lives have improved now and now they’re apologizing?
Cari 17:21
Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And I and again, I don’t know if it’s there, are they? I’ve always wondered this, because I’m trying to think about why I did it. Are they embarrassed about the progress I made? Are they ashamed that the other people aren’t making the same progress, they just not know how to handle the compliments,
Cristy 17:38
do you think i think is that they do not. They’re afraid of the other person feeling bad, like like rubbing in their face or by you know, like, or just sitting there eating a salad or drinking hot tea at dinner while everybody else is going face down in the endless possible at Olive Garden. And they’re sitting there drinking their hot tea, because they’re not doing the endless possible, pretty much nothing at all. The garden is healthy. I used to work there. I know this. And so don’t go there. But it’s valid. You know, even the salad got to be so careful with I know. So they are feeling like they feel bad about saying no. And that they feel like their willpower and their schedule and their resistance. And their commitment is going to make the other person feel bad about their lack of show that’s
Unknown Speaker 18:23
on them.
Cristy 18:25
But I know and all of it’s on the other person. But now we take it on ourselves.
Cari 18:30
You know what else I noticed that you and I don’t suffer from but I have noticed it with other people in weight loss is this idea that if they go to a party and they don’t have a drink, they’re gonna make somebody feel bad? I don’t get that. Is it because we didn’t grow up drinking?
Cristy 18:47
I don’t know. Like, it’s like you’re gonna hurt the feeling of the hostess.
Unknown Speaker 18:50
Yeah, like I have to have a seltzer.
Unknown Speaker 18:54
You don’t know it’s not vodka. It’s like, what is a deal? Like? Why do you care whether they think you’re drinking or not?
Cristy 19:02
That must be at least by the way they are. at parties. Yes. Now nobody believes me. And I know everybody. The first thing people think about is well because they know you are an ex pro fighter. Believe me. Hardly anybody really knows I’m an ex pro fighter. They it’s the confidence I exude walking into a room. No host is going to turn to me and say come on Christie. Have a drink. Seriously, you love Moscow mules. Let me just fix you up one. What’s one drink? Nobody does? Because when I say no, I am I mean it. No, thanks. I sure appreciate it. I look at the person in the eye. But adults are bullies to other adults who choose not to drink. Wow.
Cari 19:37
And you never said I’m really sorry. I have to get up early and I’m not much of a drinker. But even I even people will offer me a drink and I’ll say I’m just not a big drinker, you know, and just said instead of just saying no, I feel the need to kind of back that up with a little more information. I don’t want you know, I don’t want to think I have my coin. Not there’s anything wrong with that. But um I don’t know, I feel the need that I have to back it up with. I’m not a big drinker. And then I used to go I no fun. And then I used to say I’ve achieved a I don’t know I, I just had to, like put other words in there stupid. Just Cari, it’s okay that you’re not drinking. Just Say No, thank you. No apologies needed and move on.
Cristy 20:25
I have no problem saying no, thank you, you know, and I’m not. And here’s the Brandon Thompson and me come out. I just said I’m nice about it, you know, but I just said No, thank you. And I just I closed my mouth. I don’t say anything else. And it’s, it is really hard for people that are on a healthy lifestyle path to go and to deal with those adult bullies. How about Cari us? Us? I do not have kids. So I’m gonna say it like this anyway, because it sounds better when I say like this. How about we as parents? Okay.
Unknown Speaker 20:59
Oh, we’re
Cristy 21:02
feeling like we have to apologize, because we put healthy boundaries on our kids. Yeah, yeah.
Cari 21:07
Yeah. And I do notice that I have struggled. That’s a really good point, because I’ll do things like yeah, I I don’t what did I say the other day? Emory. I don’t want you watching that movie at that house. If you’re going to watch that movie, you’re not going over there again. And and the parents were like, and I did not explain. That’s not acceptable in our house. But a lot of parents are like, well, so we don’t believe in scary movies. And, and Sally had these nightmares. And then she started peeing the bed. And so we were like, no scary movies. Just No, no. You know, mas us mothers are mama bears when it comes to our kids. We should have the same protectiveness over our own self as we do our children. And don’t feel the need to apologize. Don’t feel the need to be what you be. when my kids were little my older kids will tell you, Cristy I did. And you know, I did not let them jump on trampolines. Because that was a brand new ICU nurse. You laugh all you want y’all. And I just saw somebody’s neck and head injuries. And I didn’t want them in a wheelchair for the rest of their life. And so I didn’t let them and they were just like mortified. I mean, their lives were just ruined, because this trampoline thing. And I may let the 10 year old who’s not grown, jump on trampolines. I don’t I don’t care anymore. I’m like, Yeah, you’re probably not gonna get that hurt, statistically, you’re worse off driving to the store with their mom. So all I’m saying is I’ve grown up. But when they were little, I didn’t care. I did not care who didn’t agree with me. I didn’t care. I was no trampolines. There’s too many neck injuries. Those poor children like to remind me of that. So I think we should feel that same passion about ourselves and our health journey and not feel the need to explain. People are like you go to the gym every day, you have to go to the gym from nine to 10. Like, yeah, that’s what I do. I don’t apologize. It’s what I do. It is part of my health journey.
Cristy 23:01
Another thing I don’t apologize for is going to sleep early. Oh, and it’s just a long kind of a long running joke. I mean, we’ve I’ve been running code red for four and a half, almost five years and like this, like the way you guys all know it. And we know that sleep is the number one rule in weight loss and good health. And I am so protective of my sleep no matter where I go, no matter what I do. Now, at the time of this recording, I’m going to be going to Cari’s house and helping her out with a few things while Brandon has back surgery. I’m not kidding when I tell you I know exactly how long it takes for my sleeping pill to kick in and takes one hour, I’m going to be taking my sleeping pill at the exact moment to where I can like I already have it planned out and it’s still it’s still four or five days away. I already know exactly. I know what I’m going to do to protect my bedroom boundaries. I know where I’m sleeping, I know where my eye mask is. I know what I’m doing. I’m going to cut off my water at a certain time. Like I’m serious, you guys. This is how but boy, we feel like and I don’t care. I dont care where I am, Cari’s house, mom’s house, my house, my cabin are traveling and I got a whole group of people. We did the staff retreat up in tamarac. And I was like, Okay, good night, and I put myself right to bed on time. But we don’t do that. We don’t we don’t do that to ourselves. We apologize for going to bed on time and quieting your house.
Cari 24:21
We really do you guys Cristy’s like our great grandpa Otto.
Unknown Speaker 24:26
He was his old big old Swedish guy. He be like well, I’m gonna go to bed so these folks can go on home. Just like that. Cristy has a spirit of pot. So she’s like, well, I’m gonna go to bed so you folks can go on home.
Cristy 24:43
Yeah, I have such a you know, the other day I took a Christian sibyls dog slate they have a beautiful one or two year old, old pet. Yeah, just the sweetest thing you’ve ever seen. And I say conflate join me and Annabel on a walk and they said sure. And I said, Listen, just unlock the door. Let me I’ve got a leash. Let me Get slate and I’ll just put him in the front door and close the door. There’s no need for small talk. And I think Christina, Sybil really appreciate that about me because there’s no nobody has to be strapped into small talk. Oh, hey, how you doing? Good. How are you? Good. How you feeling today? Oh, my legs are sore. How about you? Oh, I didn’t sleep. I did it. I can’t stand this.
Unknown Speaker 25:19
I was lazy. You’d be good for mommy.
Cristy 25:23
Yeah, like, let’s just listen. I’m just gonna, and I think that’s really nice, too. I don’t know where I was going with that. But I just think cutting through the small talk and the excuses and auto things that you don’t even want to say. Why do we feel like we need to say um, stop. Stop apologizing about your kids and your parenting. stop apologizing about your health journey. stop apologizing about your exercise routine. stop apologizing about the fact that you you want to instacart the groceries because it’s too tempting to go to the store.
Cari 25:51
I think that’s perfectly fine. We want you as rebels to be confident in yourself. And don’t devalue yourself. by apologizing. That’s what we really want for you.
Cristy 26:03
I like that don’t take yourself down a notch is that you’re no reason showing that you’re that you’re you have no confidence you’re showing low self confidence when you do that constantly apologizing for yourself Long gone are the days How about those people you know, that don’t apologize? How about you aspire to be a little more like that? and be confident and just say no, and then don’t say anything after that. Try that it’s uncomfortable. Let that silence hang Don’t be rude smile. That’s do the Barbie nickel that’s simply won’t do. You know, and and it’s a little odd. I wonder if she still does this?
Cari 26:39
I don’t normally. Do you know that? Um, have you guys ever been to see a provider that is maybe young, a medical provider, or new compared to someone who’s been a doc for a long time. And this is mid levels, PhDs and PS I don’t care. I’ve met a lot of them. And you walk in there and they’re like, we’re not going to do this. We’re going to go ahead and do this. Now. Trust me, Cari Thompson might argue with him. But one time I went in, and this gal was like, Oh my god, like this is my first time prescribing antibiotics. I’m so sorry. Let me go look it up. And I was like,
Unknown Speaker 27:12
Ah, so just
Cari 27:15
her apologizing did no good. And I remember the very first time I drew blood, this has been many, many years ago as a nursing student. The person introducing me said this is Cari, she’s a nursing student. She’s drawn blood many times and she’s gonna go ahead and draw yours. And I was like, What? No, I haven’t. But I walked in there. And I was like, Hi, I didn’t apologize. I didn’t say I didn’t know what I was doing. I faked it till I made it. And I drew the blood and I was fine. And it’s just the idea is I’m not saying we should lie. But be confident yourself and don’t devalue your skill set or yourself by feeling the need to fill the silence with apologies and I that’s just our main takeaway today. It’s not even that complicated. Yeah,
Cristy 28:02
don’t feel the silence with apology. It is just not necessary. You guys know there is a there there are there are sincere apologies when you are running late. Or when you forgot something, or you said something to hurt someone’s feelings. You should apologize and absolutely mean it and don’t do it again. But don’t just flippantly edit, edit, edit Just no. Stop. Guys, be confident.
Cari 28:23
Just be who you are. Be confident what you saying your decisions and let it speak for itself. It’s okay. If you don’t have a wine seltzer at the party. It’s fine. You be you. It’s okay. If you don’t let your children if you’re overprotective, and they’re allowed to jump on trampolines, it’s fine.
Unknown Speaker 28:42
Just be you.
Cristy 28:44
Absolutely. And start really believing that your weight loss journey and your health journey it matters just like spirituality so God is number one number two is you all right. Three is your relationship with your partner number four your kids then your dog is the way Christie looks at it but that your health needs to be at the very top of the priority list and and guys it’s just not are you would you wouldn’t apologize so much for it feel so guilty all the time. Yeah.
Cari 29:12
And I want to say one last thing cuz I know you’re getting ready to wrap it up Cristy is that for me? It wasn’t truly that I feel like a bad person or I was nervous. It was a habit. For me it was a habit like this same habit. Same exactly happened is as to the skin on the inside of my cheek or chewing my miss those of you who are listening, I’m chewing my nails. Same exact habit. And when it was brought to my attention, then I quit doing it. It was not a nervous thing for me. It was totally a speech habit. Like almost like a stutter. I think sometimes.
Cristy 29:49
Yeah. Wow. That’s Yeah, yeah. I’d love for you guys to take a look at what you’re apologizing for and see if you can break that habit. So guys, 10 pound takedown.com is the way is the website. To go to if you are wanting to join one of our monthly challenges, we would love to have you. We do have rolling monthly challenges even through Christmas. We don’t take breaks because people need us and have you looked around 88% of this country is metabolically unwell, and that could be you. So join the 10 bound takedown challenge start getting on the road to hope and healing. Learn why we believe food is the holds the power to heal or poison. We would love to have you on the challenge number 10 po u and D take down.com Cari, thank you so much for joining me, guys. We will catch you next time. Thanks so much for listening to this episode of rebel weight loss and lifestyle. Do you have a question that you’d like me to answer raw and uncut on the podcast? Then all you have to do is head over to Apple podcast on your phone or computer and do three simple things. leave a rating and review telling me what you think of the podcast. And in that review. Ask anything you want related to help weight loss or mindset. And if you want a shout out, leave your Instagram handle or name, that’s all. Then listen in to hear your question answered live raw and uncut on the next q&a episode, so I’ll see you on the next episode of rebel weight loss and lifestyle.