Sometimes a Rebel who’s struggling says to me, “Cristy, can I pay you to come sleep on my couch?”

The idea being, if I’m in their house, they’ll stay on track.

I get the thinking.

And yeah, if I slept on your couch and slapped the food outta your hand, MAYBE you’d stay on track. For a while.

But what’s most likely to happen is one (or both) of these outcomes:

1) You’d go behind my back and do what you want anyway (which would make my head explode, but I know it’d happen with some people).

2) You’d go off the rails as soon as I stopped sleeping on your couch.

Why?

Because you think you want me there to control you, since you “can’t” control yourself.

The thing is, we all have a spirit of free will, and nobody actually “wants” to be controlled.

What you want is CERTAINTY.

As in, “I want to be CERTAIN I’ll get my weight off, and if Cristy’s sleeping on my couch, I’m CERTAIN to follow the rules and foods and get this weight off!”

Man. That is victimhood thinking, through and through.

Listen, YOU are who is in control of you.

Not me.

Not your pastor’s wife.

Not even your partner.

YOU.

If that doesn’t feel true for you, it’s probably because your actions don’t match what you say you want, so you don’t believe you can trust yourself.

Or you’ve betrayed yourself to please other people (even as a kid, just to get by) so many times that you don’t know HOW to trust yourself.

Me sleeping on your couch and slapping the donut out of your hand won’t fix that.

Please hear me: I’m not saying all this to make you feel bad.

I’m saying it because I want to EMPOWER you to TAKE YOUR LIFE BACK…

Instead of waiting around for someone to come rescue you and reinforce, again, that you can’t save yourself.

No one is coming to save you.

YOU have got to save you, by owning up to your part, and then DOING your part.

Remember, doing your part doesn’t mean “doing it all on your own.”

Nobody’s ever accomplished great things “all on their own.”

You can work with others to get there. I’m saying you can’t expect others to do the work FOR you.

Show up and do YOUR part, always.